Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Enough Already!

I’m doing this in office right now. Boy, I hope I don’t get caught...

Last time I posted I mentioned that I grew up learning that I was someone who always had enough. Sure, there are times I had a little more than I expected, some indulgences to spare, and vice versa, but that’s about it. I don’t know why, but that’s how my life has been the past 20 years. I come from a family of humble background – nothing fanciful, nothing extravagant. My parents belong to the lower income bracket (their combined income could not have exceeded 5k/month), and I have 2 siblings who are still schooling now. In essence, we are a family that has to scrimp and save to afford anything slightly big-ticketed.

And that’s why I’ve always had enough, but not more. I know, given my situation to some people, they might think that I have far too little, but I’d like to think that I have enough rather than short-changed in life. Some people never needed financial assistance, but all 3 of us did. Some people never wanted bursaries as badly as we did, but we needed them for funding. Some people could afford meals at restaurants once a week, but we couldn’t. Some people could have electronics, toys, and gadgets, but we never had. All we had were books donated from our elder cousins. Even now as I mature, part of me never forgets the compromises we had to make. Of course, if I were brutally honest, I would have wanted more, as I’m sure most people will. But looking back on how I grew up not having much to brag about, I learned that to appreciate some things in life we have to be put in situations where opportunities were scarce, and offers were limited.

Throughout the years, we have had our ups and downs, but somehow, we never ran out of money. I don’t know why, I don’t know how, but I am fortunate enough that it is just this way. We had money for laptops, televisions, travelling, and furniture when the time came. Having 3 students in a family essentially means that the 4k they earned a month went into supporting us as well. Just how this money came about I am extremely bewildered. Come to think of it, I’ve never questioned about it. Perhaps it’s my apathy, or my general indifference for matters regarding finances, but it has never crossed my mind to ask about it.

There was once I told daniel that I’d rather not have a carefree life of substantial financial freedom, because I wanted a life where I have to make financial plans. Do you know what it feels like to plan an overseas trip on a very strict budget? Do you know what it feels like to make a long-term saving plan for your house and car, and realise that it cannot be achieved in the near future? If you don’t, then you have indeed been very fortunate. I’m not saying that I want to have just enough all my life, because I know for sure that’s what my parents would go against in their greatest might. They have not invested in my education for me to live with just enough. What I’m saying is that even if I were rich someday, I will never forget that I came from a place of little choices. Financial prudence, or simply thrift, will always follow me no matter what.

I’ve always wanted to be an entrepreneur. What I aspire to be has nothing to do with making tons of money. Instead, it is the epitome of giving back to society for what I’ve taken from them. Unlike the phantom money that made sure I always had enough, I know where all my financial assistance and bursary money came from.

So for everyone else who always had enough like me, know that it’s not wrong to want more – for yourself, for your family, for the ones you love – but remember that one day if you became incredibly successful, always find the heart to make someone’s life a little more than enough. I can swear upon my life that even the slightest help would be the greatest consolation. It goes a long, long way.

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