Tell Me

And then it struck me that I haven't been writing here for quite awhile - perhaps the longest hiatus since I started this blog. So, here I am.

It has been awfully uneventful for the past 2 weeks, and I'm still hanging on a thread waiting for a certain reply. I'm not sure why, but I tend to always think that extraordinary things will never happen to ordinary people like me. It's as if everything was predestined and if you're not good enough that's that. I know we live on dreams, and I know to strive for them is our purpose, but there are times when things don't go our way and we're forced to take another route - one that's less scenic. I have gotten used to it, and should be immune to disappointments by now, but somehow, this still gets me a little.

It makes me wonder what I'm doing wrong, or if my inadequacy was inbred. The last I checked, I was full of enthusiasm and hope when I clicked the "submit" button, all ready for good news. I figure it's time that I take a look at myself once again and re-explore what I am capable of, and what I'm clearly not.

I thought I felt a small needle prick at my heart, then the pain was gone. It's almost as if I've imagined it, but it felt real.